This Week in Horseville

I continue to feel super burnt out and discouraged.

But, I am leaving for a week of sunshine and R&R this weekend and after that I think I only work 3 days in the next 30. So...I am also feeling grateful.

I had a lesson on Audrey last night, and it went decently. We shared again with Ginger and her new owner (see, again I am so lucky...I get to pet that cute Ginny nose still whenever I like).

She's adorable, as always. Just as fuzzy IRL ;)

Audrey actually walked up to me and said hi when I got there...which NEVER happens because she's not really the friendly type. So, I felt quite flattered. Knowing her, though, she wasn't saying hi, more like "C'mon lady, you're late, it's lesson time, we have a job to do, hop to it!"

I was later sure it was the latter thought, because Shark Bite Audrey struck again. I learned it runs in the family, because when I called her Shark Bite within hearing of EC she laughed and said her full sister is nicknamed Snapping Turtle. LOL, they must be quite the family! You'll just have to trust me that Audrey is actually very sweet and kind underneath it all.

It's so dark so early. Here's an attempt at a post ride pic of Ms Audrey :)

Anyway, it was very cold out last night and Audrey was feeling quite tense, so a good part of my ride was just on a looser rein, pushing her into a contact, flexing her and encouraging her to lift her back and use her body.

All the same things I do with Bridget, but Audrey is great because I always know we will get there, where with B sometimes she never really lets go and I can get in my head a little about it and think that it was a 'bad' ride.

Look at this cute Bridget pic...it's from years ago now, but I like it and it's much better quality than the crappy cell phone ones I provide you.

So, while we didn't do anything super interesting, it was a good reminder that even the Audreys of the world sometimes need a long and low sort of day or a longer warmup to get in the groove. (also, that I am not completely inept... as mentioned, I think it is just a fact of life that A's default is to feel fantastically free, where B's default is to be stuck....just how it is and some days I am simply not going to get B feeling as loose as Audrey, doesn't mean it was a wasted or 'bad' ride, it just is what it is)

Crappy cellphone pic, redux. B and I doing the circle of death pole exercise last weekend.

Anyway, back to the lesson. The canter work was not as good as it has been, because the tension kept creeping back in, also she was super annoyed with my legs. I swear I wasn't nagging her, but I do think perhaps her being tense in her back was contributing in that I needed to be that much looser and giving to help her come round and I probably was not and she was reacting to that. I'd like to find a time to watch EC ride her again to get a visual of how she rides her.

The sun came out! B got to go out and eat grass this week.

We did, however, find some fantastic trot work...she's quite talented, but maybe(?) greener than you'd expect for the level, so she's only just properly carrying herself without the rider doing so much. I love that once you help her find that balance, she wants to go back to it and stay there...so cool. So, we practiced having 'gears' (no definition for them, just my imaginary feel of what they are) in the trot, and in my mind I think we made nice transitions between 1-3rd (so, a collected 'imagine she's on the spot' trot to a good medium trot), 4th gear I had to be careful not to let her speed up and lose balance, and so I didn't attempt the imaginary 5th gear giant extension I'm sure she has.

Because no weekly update is complete without a Sophie mention. I don't think Sophie will have the Audrey talent, but she's a pretty cool girl in her own right and I'm very excited to start riding her a little next summer. Sophie as a foal. Not sure I shared this one, the breeder sent it after she arrived and I think it got lost in all my new pony media :)

So, with that, I am leaving tomorrow for that much needed R&R. Fingers crossed this more laid back month (and some margaritas!) refresh my mindset and gives me some inspiration for the upcoming new year.

Bridget will be on vacation also, doing what she always does...eat and sleep...sometimes simultaneously. If someone wanted a picture that symbolizes everything Bridget, this is it.

Circle Of Struggle

Last night's lesson...did not go as I had hoped it would. But, it went pretty much how my brain thought it would. Stupid brain.

I showed up with dressage saddle in tow, and EC was like "Wait, our schedules are weird right now so you're sharing with F tonight and I think she's jumping."

Me: "I'm going to die."

EC: " It's just the circle exercise. I'll keep the jumps small."

We're probably all familiar with the circle of death. It's "just" a 20m circle! (with jumps)

Me: "Logically, I know I can do can do it. Emotionally, my brain is saying I can't. I can't jump horses other than Bridget."

EC: "It's just a circle. You can do this one handed, I bet. We'll start with poles. You'll be fine."

And so, we started with poles. And it was fine. When we moved up to canter Audrey was a little more onward bound than I'm used to, but we sorted it and did a respectable job, fitting in 5, then 3, then 4 strides as asked. I was like "Yep, got this. It's just a circle and we're just practicing our different canters. No big deal."

Next EC put them up to cross rails. Yours truly forgot to breathe over the first and held Audrey to her bounciest canter, thus ensuring we got what felt like the world's biggest and most show jumpiest crossrail. There was substantial hang time involved...in the literal sense for me, having been left somewhere far, far behind.

So, of course my brain was like "See! You can't jump! You're terrible."

This is the part where I'd like to say I told my brain to shut up, fixed my error, and rode super well and confidently. But no.

I repeated the above fail a few more times, with varying distances, levels of altitude, and explorations of the entire real estate of her saddle.

And so, we trotted the exercise.

It was marginally better, although I was still basically a frozen monkey.

We finished with dropping one side of the crossrails down, and trotting into each and cantering out until I could do that without scaring anyone too badly.

The best I can say is that it happened. I got it done. It wasn't pretty. I couldn't even find a balanced two point  - I think partly because I was so tense and in my head that I couldn't relax down into my heels.

And, oh boy was I hard on myself after. Torn between listening to the mean voice in my head that says I'm simply a useless and awful rider, alternating with being absolutely furious at myself for letting that voice take over and not kicking it to the curb.

I 100% know I can do that exercise. I did it bareback on Bridget a couple of weeks ago, over slightly bigger crossrails, even. I would expect a learning curve and some fails with Audrey. That's fair. 

What's incredibly frustrating to me that my emotional brain stepped in at the littlest hint of adversity (that first awkward jump) and pretty much ran the show so that I was borderline having an anxiety attack for the next 20 minutes while basically making my negative expectations of my riding ability a reality.

That was sh!tty.



Of course we can't end this post with that. So, on the plus side:

- The first part of the lesson with just the poles was great. Super helpful for me as far as adjusting the canter.

- When it got tough, I didn't give up, get off, quit, or cry. Even though I really wanted to do all of those things at one point or another.

- I was able to recognize I was having trouble confidence and anxiety wise and verbalize that to EC. (I found saying something hard because honestly, I felt embarrassed)

- I was able to utilize some of the breathing and focus tricks I've been reading up on in some sports psychology books and practicing in yoga.

-And so, within a minute or two, I was able to calm the f down enough to breathe and listen to EC's instruction and continue the lesson.

-It feels like forever (I do remember the last time and it was a xc clinic 2.5 years ago) since my brain was a jerk like that, so despite that rough lesson last night, maybe overall I'm winning.

-I obviously care very much about my riding and being better at it.

- Next week's lesson is dressage :D

Dressage Nerd

I think I've mentioned my goal of making time to study outside of lessons, so that I can optimize my lesson time by hopefully spending more time actually Doing The Things rather than having the concepts explained to me for excess amounts of precious lesson minutes.

It's not that my coach isn't genius at explaining things, because she is. I'm just sometimes a bit slow on the uptake when I'm trying to ride and listen at the same time :)

Luckily, it's very easy to watch videos and read articles from the comfort of my couch, lol

Last weekend's study time involved delving back into the Robert Dover Clinic, reading some excellent notes from a couple of different Carl Hester clinics, watching a few classes from the US Dressage Finals, and finally, watching some YouTube videos of riders I admire, trying to see what aids they're using and how they're using their horses and their own bodies to make it all look so easy. I watched a couple of vlogs from Olivia Towers too, which were super neat because they involved some clips of schooling, test riding, lessons, and what she works on at the gym and in her mindset to help what she perceives her weaknesses to be.

And so, in my lesson this week when my coach asked me to go from walk pirouette to canter pirouette my first instinct was "Oh haha, you're so funny!" Then, a couple of seconds later, I was like "Why not? She wouldn't ask if she didn't think I could." Followed by some further confidence because I had just watched video of Carl and Charlotte introducing pirouettes, as well as multiple US Dressage Final tests with the helpful commentary explaining the good and not so good scores for the movement.

You probably wouldn't expect me to have mastered pirouettes in my first attempt from watching video. And, I didn't. There were some nice steps, some trial and error where I lost the shoulder and they got too big or  where I used too much outside aids and they got too small and hopping. But you know what? It wasn't all terrible either. I had a good visual in my head of what I wanted, and how to set it up, and for that, the video watching proved really, really helpful for me.

Taking the feel and tempo I've been learning to seek in collected canter, and combining it with the bend and aids from a walk pirouette, also very cool. EC is great at giving you seemingly non related exercises for months, and then boom you're putting them together and you're accomplishing a thing.

(And, WHOA, did I mention I did my first canter pirouettes!!!I don't know why, but of all the horsey things one could do, canter pirouettes and tempi changes are both serious Goals for me. So, bear with me, because I'm pretty excited.)

Final words of wisdom from EC (paraphrasing):

"As a rider, you get to a certain point where I am not teaching you anything truly new. Now it is just a matter of taking the basics I've taught you, and refining it all."

In other words, her nice way of saying don't over think it. Those canter pirouettes at their simplest are taking the canter I know how to create, adding haunches in, and placing it on a circle.

Once I got the feel, I practiced riding in and out of them as you would in a test. Again, certainly not perfect, or even complete 360s, but oh so fun to play with.

My aids need refining. My timing needs improvement. There are also millions of other little things I will be fixing or working on. But for now, just knowing I CAN Do The Thing is pretty darn cool.

Not sure this mare will ever have a collected enough canter to pull it off, but I'd like to try

I think another excellent goal to carry on indefinitely would be to continue to take advantage of available educational opportunities as much as possible. Kind of a no brainer, really, but it's easy to get lazy and be happy just knowing what you know. I'm finding online resources invaluable in helping me figure out some of the finer points of what I'd like to accomplish as a rider, and I'm finding a lot of the material is really inspiring me with new goals and ideas to try.

Some Learning

EC returned from vacation yesterday and texted me asking if I wanted a lesson after work. Hell yes! I was in desperate need of some progress, after feeling a lot like I just tread water when left to my own devices with Audrey. We have perfectly pleasant solo rides, which is nice, but it's fun to push the boundaries a little more in a lesson.

Bridget, of course, has been maybe (but maybe not?) a little broken, so it was nice to just hop on A and have some positive thoughts rather than all the sad feelings I have about Bridget being not quite right. We're giving B a little more R&R before we xray, and the waiting and not knowing is hard for me.

B is the best pony. Playing moving couch last weekend.

Cute side track: G called tonight to let me know he gave B her Bute today, for which I was very grateful. Just as he was about to hang up, he was like " She's the only brown one there with a white back leg, right?" I confirmed he fed the right horse without any hesitation, simply because he fed the meds without issue. No other horse on the property would have come up to the gate in hopes of eating Bute straight up out of a bucket, lol.

Hungry hippo

Anyway...a lesson recap.

In keeping with my forth quarter goals of bring a better student, I reviewed a few of the videos from last year's USEF Robert Dover Horsemastership Clinic while EC was away. Specifically, the tips of lead changes and half pass since those are pretty relevant to my current lessons. Every time I watch those videos I get inspired, so in addition to all the excellent tips of those topics, I also went into my ride being very conscious of having A quite sharp off my aids and keeping that energy circulating through her body.

I'm always in a rush since my lesson is right after work then I have an appointment following, so my media of Audrey is always lacking!

Sure enough, we had a lesson in lead changes :) After playing with collected walk to remind me of how active I want her hind end in canter, we moved up to trot. EC wanted me to place her in renvers 4-5 strides, straight for 1, then travers for 4-5, then straight 1, then back to renvers...repeat all the way around the arena, staying on an inside track. This was actually super helpful for me as far as understanding where my body should be in the changes...the aids are quite similar. The awareness and accuracy of striding, also helpful. Finally, the idea that her shoulders and mine align and stay straight and square to wherever we are headed, her ribcage bends around my inside leg, her hind end comes in off my outside leg.

 Keeping the shoulders on an unwavering track makes the changes of bend way smoother. You know how you think you get something, but suddenly the lightbulb goes off and you realize you still weren't quite there? That was me last night, finally setting my line up well in advance  and being very accurate with that shoulder placement. Changing the bend isn't so much the question for A, it's the shoulders holding the track that is crucial.  Both A and B evade through the outside shoulder in exactly the same way, so it's actually slightly rewarding to already have the tools to fix A's wiggliness in my toolbox. Thanks Bridget!

Enjoy some random pictures of Bridget to break the text

Lastly, but not least(ly?), onwards to practicing changes!
For my own sake, we exaggerated them slightly, both to help with collection, and to drill into me setting up and keeping the slight changes in bend. There are a lot of moving parts to consider on a horse like A! So, Robert Dover would have been disappointed by A's slightly swinging hindquarters at times through the change. On the short side, I had Audrey almost in travers but not quite, held it until a stride from the centerline, and then switched the bend to straight, then almost renvers.  And so, in place of the stride of straightness we were practicing in trot, we had me asking for lead changes in that moment of straightness. Carry through to the corner and my slight bend becomes travers again with the change of direction :) Obviously, this is me, and it wasn't all quite so smooth. There were some mistimed cues resulting in cooked changes, and a rather interesting display of hopping up and down on the spot before changing, due to me forgetting the memo about being vigilant about holding her shoulders on the line.

We did a bit of work on the quarter line, and I can see where that is leading - tempi changes! EEK, so exciting. First, though, I need to nail the timing on single changes better.

After years of riding younger horses and Bridgets, it's really really fun to sit on a more established horse and just get to play. Audrey is the quirkiest mare I've ever met, but she's very talented and loves to work, which are all good things for me. Nothing comes super easy due to her often dramatic opinions, but she's willing to work for you and doesn't hold many grudges.  As always, I very much appreciate the opportunity to ride and lesson on her.

Not As Good

You knew eventually it had to happen! A not so great lesson on the lovely Audrey...

I could rationalize it a million different ways - she just ran XC yesterday (in line with my book review last week re: the horse with basic training - yes, she's competing PSG dressage, but she also jumps regularly and events a couple of times a year too). I've missed two weeks worth of lessons, which also doesn't help, when you're me.

I was really feeling this as my morning inspiration.

But honestly? I think we were just sort of due. I didn't bring my A game, which I find frustrating given how much I look forward to these rides and how much I can potentially learn. Mentally, it was a very long day and my mindset wasnt the most focused or positive it's ever been. I hate knowing what I want to do, and yet being unable to put the pieces together. My body and mind just didn't want to cooperate as well as they might have. Ah well.

Audrey had a little of her own thing going on, I think just kind of frustrated with my ineptness and also the fact she was missing dinner time, lol.

Sophie has similar opinions of me at times. Here she's mad I didnt scratch her butt just right, so she had to do it herself while giving me a mare glare side eye , lol

Low spots included my inability to keep her in a counter canter without some serious crab imitations, plus some very impressive kicking at my leg, one of which only narrowly missed the arena mirrors, but of course hit the wall hard enough to scare everyone, including herself :o Because if everyone didn't know it wasn't going great before, they sure knew now.

I was perusing Facebook yesterday and was like "I know those adorable ears!" Hi Ginger! 

On the plus side: I wasn't at all intimidated. I learned a lot. The bad things were mostly just moments in time that we worked through. We got some fantastic canter transitions between medium and collected, and I really feel like I'm sitting and influencing her canter a million times better than at the beginning of the summer. Trot work ended on a fantastic note, with some very fancy feeling movement!

And, a little something to look forward to - my coach is away for a few weeks, and I get to exercise Ms Audrey. Free rides to practice on one of my favorite horses are a gift I plan to enjoy fully!

Just Dressage

Another Monday night, another Best Lesson Ever.


We continued on with the travers to shoulder in to travers exercise of last week. Having done a little studying in the meantime, I felt a lot more confident and less confused about where to put Audrey's feet. It's really not complicated at all...to recap, the horse maintains the same slight "C" shape bend in both, you just move the front end or back end to the inside track depending on which you're doing. My brain does not do well with left/right directions somehow, so lateral work tends to happen by feel rather than step by step thought processes, which makes for poorly written blog recaps!

- Tip I found useful for both: ask for the same amount of bend and energy and hind leg activity you'd ask for on a good 10m circle.

An added complication: EC told me to grab "bigger" spurs before I got on. "Longer and pointier but not TOO long and pointy" I think were her exact words, lol. I grabbed the "TOO long and pointy" ones, obviously, because they all seemed long and pointy to me, so I was feeling pretty aware of my leg. As was Audrey, lol.

On a related note, she went from sleepy when I got on to pretty darn lively as the ride progressed :)

Bridget being lively this summer, and now helping break my wall of text.

But it was really, really good. Audrey was happy to show off her moves and add some extra flair to a pretty boring exercise (for her, lol) The trot was getting pretty darn passage-y feeling, and that added stepping under and elevation makes it pretty easy to move her body around. So fun!

The canter got a little "western" when I accidentally goosed her with my outside leg when she started to drift. It's frustrating, I know better, and yet at least once a ride I fail to use my inside seatbone and outside rein effectively, panic when I lose her, and go straight to yelling with outside leg. One day I'll learn for real!

We finished up with nice canter work in both directions, alternating having her move out a little, then bringing it back to shoulder in or travers and putting it on the same 10m circle exercise as the trot work. The canter was rougher for me geometry wise, and I had so much horse it was a bit of a novelty for me, but I felt like we got there and ended at a good place.

Given my concerns with the spurs and Audrey being so ramped up, I was glad we didn't push me by experimenting more with flying changes tonight. Surviving one mini rodeo and fixing it was probably a wise place to leave things for me, lol.

So, even with some challenges, it was Best Lesson Ever because the energy and amount of forward she brought to the table was incredible - a feel like nothing I've ever experienced. There were a couple of times I rewarded her by asking her to move out of lateral work to a straight line and the power on tap there was pretty exhilarating! Like an airplane taking off.

Which brings me to yet more pondering. People at our barn are often like "Oh, I don't jump/event/barrel race/whatever. I just do dressage." Like it's the lesser, safer thing to do.

I'm just going to put it out there: If the amount of athleticism, energy, forward and power required to do upper level dressage well is anything like what I've been experiencing on Audrey - holy crap, "just dressage" riders have some serious guts. There's a fine line between brilliance and crazy in some of those horses, I bet.  It's incomparable to anything else I've ever done, and at least for me, a bigger adrenaline rush. I wish I was a better writer so I could give you some sort of apt comparison to sports cars, coiled springs, airplanes, bounce grids, whatever. But I've got nothing. Just some advice:

If you ever get the opportunity to ride an upper level horse, try it.

I'm pretty sure I'm now well and truly addicted to dressage. Not exactly where I thought my life's equestrian adventures would take me way back when, but here we are :)

Actual picture of us post lesson ;)

Learning Is Fun

My fun weekend group trail ride was not fun. We ran into 4 separate ground wasp nests in a 2.5 hour ride. Remind me this time next year to give the forest trails a pass. Those wasps are grumpy and looking for a fight, because why else would they build their nests in the middle of a very busy trail? Our poor horses all got stung multiple times :(

Here's a not-so-kind piece of trailcraft/learning opportunity - the first horse passing over the nest rarely gets stung. If you're last you're more likely to get the worst of it. So, my suggestion to you: in desperate times, race your "friends" home ;)

Your firearms are useless against them. In all seriousness, we were all fine and no one was too traumatized. We're all still friends. Bridget won the race though  ;)

On the plus side, there were no wasps in the arena tonight, so my lesson was an instant win over the previous day's ride.

I don't know why I do this, but prior to every lesson I get a little weird about running through possible excuses in my mind to skip it. Everything from being tired (Mondays are super long days for me) to Negative T whispering I'm wasting time or money because I'll never get better.

And then every week, I suck it up, go ride, then come here and am all "OMG best lesson ever! I love Audrey! I love my coach! I'm learning so much! This is the best use of my time/money!" Every. Time. Its never not been fun. I have never sucked so bad my coach has fired me. I'm never so tired that I'm sleepy or unable to learn. There haven't even ever been wasps or other angry wildlife there ;)

Basically, my brain's before lesson arguments are invalid, and yet I continue to give them air time. Dumb brain.

Bridget, probably : "why even ride at all? Horses make excellent house pets"

Anyway, in the interest of keeping this entry a reasonable length, I'll finish up with a quick recap of what we did in our lesson:

-Worked on unlocking the base of Audrey's neck to start. Lots of walk and trot moving her neck inside, outside, up, down, while keeping a consistent forward tempo and a soft bend through her body around my inside leg. Shoulders stay straight on the circle, neck flexes independently of her body. Same as what I do with Bridget in warm up.

-Moving forward to shoulder in alternating with travers in trot, around the arena with intermittent 10m circles to help establish angle if needed. This was an excellent mental exercise for me as the bend stays the same, just the angle of where I'm placing her on the circle changes (travers the haunches are inside track on the circle, shoulder in places the front end on the inside track.)

-Putting those pieces together in the canter. Lots of shoulder in and travers alternating, figure eight pattern using full arena. Straighten across center, flying change, back to shoulder in and travers on circle.

Fun. Fun. FUN. I appreciate that EC and Audrey are both of the opinion that my mistakes are really not a big deal. EC commented a few weeks ago that I'm balanced enough and don't interfere/get uptight so that Audrey just does whatever it is she thinks I asked for. Shes not stressed because as far as shes concerned she's doing a good job. So basically, sometimes I fail in communicating what I want so badly that Audrey can't even tell, lol. Goals :)

In seriousness, I do feel like EC's giving me a bit of a license to just play with Audrey and have fun. She's offering me tips and hints and correcting me when I go wrong,  but also letting me figure out and think things through independently a bit, rather than really trying to coach play by play style and talk me through each detail. Even if that means I get it wrong and mess it up sometimes. Super cool, because I feel like I'm learning almost more from the mistakes than from the times I get it right.

Bridget cares not how I ride, only that I bring treats.

Good Things

The weather is so stinky. On the radio this morning, they mentioned on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the worst , our air quality is rated '10 plus'. Makes sense because my lungs are like 'Is this even air anymore?' So, due to not being able to breathe, I cancelled my Audrey lesson tonite. Sad face. It's now been 8 days since I rode last and 2 weeks since a lesson. Even sadder face.

Cute sad face courtesy of Ginger. Random (and usually unrelated to the blog content ) media, brought to you by me, as always.

To turn this post positive, I thought this might be an excellent time to delve into why I am am so sad to miss my lessons. Not to dwell on the negative of missing them, but to focus on why I love my weekly lessons so much. You know I love Audrey and I know you're probably sick of hearing how wonderful she is, so we won't go there. Rest assured she's still Best Pony Ever.

Sophie = Future Best Pony Ever. Sophie also = Pony who is so golden and shiny my cell phone camera can't cope. She's the fuzzy glowing thing in my photos that makes Bridget disappear :)

It's been quite a while though since I mentioned the other part of the equation - the coaching itself. So, let's do a good old top ten list of the things I most appreciate about my coach (and good coaches in general!)

1. Has my back. She's running her own business, and no, that business does not revolve around my riding goals or needs/wants. But she's excellent at listening to my (often rambling/incoherent) thoughts and suggesting real world goals and milestones I might want to work towards. No matter how unrealistic my goals or how poorly I ride, she's always able to find a positive way to move forward. I put in the work, she's going to 110% match my effort and help me get where I want to be.

2. Professional. Does not tolerate negative barn gossip, riders who bully or mistreat their horses (or other riders). Ditto for other trainers - no negativity is welcome! I appreciate that the rare time something needs to be addressed, it's done so in a quiet and effective way. Is normally punctual for lessons, and even things like bills are timely and easily understandable.

3. Honest. Doesn't sugar coat anything, but doesn't beat you (or your horse) up over it either. If feedback is negative, always follows up by suggesting a positive action you can take to make steps towards improving.

4. Rides and Competes. This is not a deal breaker for me, but I do appreciate someone who can get on my horse and problem solve if need be. I also like that she's competing and riding with her own coach and bringing back fresh ideas and experiences to share. Bonus points for being active in more than one discipline.

 5. Assertive/Confident. OK, I need to fess up here that I REALLY don't like being told what to do, and this quality can rub me the wrong way with some people. In a riding coach though, it works super well for me because I have someone pushing my boundaries and challenging me to meet their expectations of me. I find people who are confident in themselves also generally don't feel the need to play some of the power games other coaches might.

My two enjoying their vacation last week.

6. Qualified. This matters to me - I always look for someone who has not just the riding and training credentials, but someone who has put in the time to get an education in coaching or is certified through our national organization. Riding instruction doesn't come cheap, so I might as well pay for someone with a professional qualification in coaching AND riding.

7. Positive. This ties into a lot of my points, but I think it deserves it's own. Riding is HARD, so I really, really appreciate someone who approaches it from a positive, hard working mindset. Someone that can encourage me a little and find ways to keep me positive and motivated.

8. Good Communication. Happy to stop mid lesson to explain a concept, and able to break it down into tiny steps if need be. Equally good at explaining the how and the why of what she's asking and presenting alternate explanations or options if need be. On the same general topic - I appreciate coaches who take the time to send out emails or texts about goings on at the barn - everything from schedule updates to links to useful online articles to reminders for show entries, etc.

9. Flexible. Look at me -  middle aged rider on a not dressage pony living a ferry ride away from anything, who has dreams of upper level dressage. And yet, she's provided me with plenty of ideas and options to help me get there.

10. Open Minded. I like having a coach who encourages me to learn outside of her teaching - whether it's reading books or taking clinics with other people. Discussion of the whys and hows of riding and training is always welcome and I always feel like I am free to ask questions or use her as a sounding board for ideas or decisions.

And, my particular coach gets a bonus thing I really appreciate, because I'd never expect this of anyone:

11. Gives Me Lessons On Her (Very Nice) Horse.  You knew I couldn't make a list without including Audrey! In all seriousness though, I don't know too many people who are so generous with ride time on their upper level horse, especially one who is still learning and moving up the levels.

Bridget, the other Best Pony, has a new field to mow while we wait out the weather. She's happy (and shiny!)

What's your favorite thing about your coach or trainer?

Lesson Recap

You're probably all sick of me saying I had another fantastic lesson, but there it is. I did. Again.

Don't worry, it's not all perfect - my life/luck is ridiculous sometimes! Someone, somewhere, stole some personal info of mine and this week made a bunch of very large charges to my credit card, all in a 24 hour span. Very annoying thing to happen in normal circumstances, but you will recall we are currently shopping around for the best mortgage rate for the dream farm, and so having my account frozen for a fraud investigation for the next two weeks isn't exactly making me feel warm and fuzzy. So, let's just say these fun weekly lessons are extra appreciated right now.

I haven't watched this movie, but when I got a call confirming the super expensive vacation tour I had apparently booked for someone, my coworkers suggested we try to intercept and meet the person a la this movie. I might actually find this funny...sometime later.

Moving onwards... to a happy lesson recap :)

Audrey had a bit more pep than normal since it's summer camp week and EC's been busy. Her new saddle is also helping - I would have said she was fantastic before, but now there is a whole extra level of softness and roundness on offer right off the bat.

We did all the normal things we do: Walk/trot/canter, collect and extend in each gait. Shoulder in, haunches in on the quarterline and on a 15m circle. 

The big breakthrough for me was that I'm really starting to be able to sit and collect the canter by degrees where before, the forward and back was a bit too dramatic and often I'd lose the quality of the canter (or even lose the canter altogether). Still a work in progress, but I'm starting to get a feel.

 Also, in general I'm getting much quicker about getting back to where I was before I made a mistake, and far better about correcting myself before the mistake actually happens. Haunches in on the circle was cause for me to ask for yet more inadvertent flying changes (I think I may never learn to fully contain that outside shoulder on the left lead), but I'm getting better about just adding a walk or trot step and getting back on track immediately.

Audrey is totally happy toodling along with me on board right now, and came walking up to meet me in the field, looking for a job to do. No visible anger when I brushed her too, which is somewhat new - she is a princess and doesn't have time for such things.  I'm also not sure there is a brush in existence she doesn't find either too hard or too soft. A happy, content Audrey feels nice since A has many opinions about a lot things. Most of the time I think her opinions regarding me are probably not flattering!

Well Worth It

I don't kid myself, private lessons with a great coach on a talented horse are probably never going to come cheap. My lessons on Audrey come in fairly reasonably priced (I think) at $75 for about 30-45 min of riding.

That $75 a week for "extra" horse expenses is a stretch for me, so there's been a bit of budget shuffling to make it happen. G and I keep our own finances and don't share a bank account, but I do still struggle with a bit of guilt over choosing to spend $300 a month on something solely for myself with nothing visibly concrete to show for it.

Sorry honey, can't afford my own new car, so I'm borrowing your truck again....my budget is dedicated to horses of a different sort ;) G and I joke that our bank accounts are called "For Horses" and "Not For Horses", no prizes for guessing whose is whose, lol

I had another super lesson this week on the ever amazing Audrey. I was thinking about my life choices on my drive home tonight and yeah, $75 a week is so worth it, I have no regrets. Not only am I learning things I'll carry forward with me far into the future, but the amount of confidence I'm gaining in myself and my riding is invaluable too. Don't get me wrong, it's certainly not all sunshine and rainbows all the time, but the tough stuff is what's motivated me to get back to running, eating better, hitting the gym, and generally looking after myself. All very good things that will make me a happier, healthier, and better person.

We're using the term "running" loosely right now...better look out, my 30 min 3k game is strong ;)

I hate to admit this too, but it's been a very long time (actually, I'm not sure it's EVER happened) since I've really, wholeheartedly been excited to ride, especially in a lesson. I do enjoy riding, and I certainly enjoy learning. I like feeling like I'm making progress. I always get a lot out of lessons. But there's always been that feeling in the back of my mind that maybe I can't do this. What if this this is clinician who finally levels with me that I'm wasting my time? 

Can't even.

Bridget is fantastic in a million ways, but I feel like she can be super unforgiving. If you don't get it perfectly right, she won't waste any time trying. Actually, even if you get it perfectly right, she might not bother :) Not always ideal for someone whose default is to think they are not a good enough rider. Prior to life with Bridget, I had big struggles off and on with feeling overhorsed, so riding was at best anxiety inducing, at worst, dangerous. Still, I love it, go figure. 

I owe Bridget the world though, for getting my confidence back enough to gallop and jump again. I might feel like a completely inadequate rider and trainer with her sometimes, but we've certainly made a dent in my horsey bucket list!

This is the first time in my life all that baggage is pretty much left at the door. Riding Audrey is just straight up fun. I love her. I am 0% nervous on her, I have no agenda. I have no shows or goals  on the horizon to stress over, and coach I feel very comfortable with. I can make mistakes and neither Audrey nor EC really care. So long as I'm trying, Audrey will do her best to figure out what I want and while she certainly lets me know when I'm not up to standard, she forgets about it just moments later, no grudges held.

Sophie also holds zero grudges. And yes, that's B still sulking in the background because I put fly spray on them (gasp!). She hilarious, I just love her curmudgeonly self. Once I start brushing or otherwise giving Sophie attention, you'd better believe B is suddenly my best friend and Sophie is not allowed to share, lol

 So,  all that's left is to feel super excited, like small child excited, to just get in the saddle and see what Audrey and I can do today. Yes, I will make a million mistakes, no it won't be perfect. But you can be certain it will be fun! 

Changes (Of The Fun, Flying Variety)

This might have been my favorite lesson ever.

I know I've mentioned a few times how good Audrey has been for reminding me to stay centered and to keep my upper body strong but not resistant. If I shift my weight or tense any part of my body, you'd better believe she's going to offer up SOMETHING because she is a good girl and gives me a lot more credit than she should.

Bridget prefers sleep to offering solutions to my requests, but I love her for it.

You've probably also gathered by now that often, in the canter, her SOMETHING offered in reaction to my above rider challenges often involves inadvertant flying changes :)

I'd like to think I'm improving, because it's been a few rides since I've had rider issues resulting in pony drama and the surprise changes have been minimal of late. Full disclaimer: It could be the magic saddle, though, too.

Today, as I was cantering  and shortening through the center of the arena, I could feel her really thinking and hoping I'd ask for a change. I laughed and mentioned it to EC, who suggested I just go ahead and surprise her and ask.

Random pics of my girls, sorry once again for the lack of Audrey lesson pictures. Especially in summer,the barn is empty of barn rats when I have my lessons in the evenings.

That's when I had to fess up. I've never really had a horse with solid changes, so I could probably count the times I've ridden them in a dressage context (intentionally at least, lol)  on one hand. My question: do I ask the same as on a western horse? Or jumping? Answer: Don't over think it! Get your good canter, keep her straight, feel where her legs are at like you would as you ask for a good walk to canter transition. Simply weight your new inside stirrup slightly and slide your new outside leg back a little. Catch her with your new outside rein. Ask her to stay round and stepping up. Do not pull on her nose....she needs to be straight! Basically, most of the things I'm doing when I inadvertently get a change on her when I'm just trying to change the bend :)

Sophie is still really bum high. Grow pony, grow! Become a mini Audrey, please :)

EC remained convinced changes are no big thing and we didn't need to discuss it to death. I just needed to go play around and ask for them. And so I did. It took a couple of tries to get the feel (after all my talk about Audrey being uber sensitive, I still wanted to override them the first couple of times and ended up with some very crooked and...expressive! changes and cross cantering, even a couple of inadvertent one tempi changes down the long side as I over-corrected my body, lol, it's incredible that she puts up with my shenanigans :), and then after a couple of tries each way it was like the light bulb went on and it really was no big thing. She's fairly tricky to keep straight enough on her tougher side, and almost too easy (anticipating) on the other, but we did it! On purpose! Nicely! Easily!

And, oh my goodness, was that fun. I know for a lot of you changes are no big deal. For me, it's pretty exciting to start to get the feel and timing nailed down and have that tool available to me. One day I want to do tempis (on purpose), after all!

G has about a million pics of my ponies on his phone! Who knew?!

I'm very lucky that EC will let me ride her up and coming "big" horse and play around with new to me things and never worry I'll set her training back. I'm also aware of how lucky I am that Audrey is that perfect mix of very expressive and opinionated without being dangerous if you mess it all up. She's giving me a lot of confidence in using my rider toolkit and problem solving when it doesn't go to plan.  Quite often I have been far too passive because I lack confidence in myself to do the right thing, but that's changing a little because she is so responsive to what I ask...I'm communicating a lot more clearly and confidently. I'm very hopeful that what I'm learning now will translate over to Sophie and even Bridget.

Trying for a nice picture of us, 20 pictures taken and not one has all of us looking "normal" lol. Just keeping it real over here :)

Although, to keep me humble...Audrey did pull a very dirty move and nipped me hard on the arm as I was leading her into the barn prior to the lesson. Very, very quick and stealthy about it too, then the whole instant "OMG I DIDN"T ACTUALLY MEAN TO TOUCH YOU! PLEASE DON"T HURT ME" shocked face and so much sadness when I got after her a little for it. All the mare feelings, lol. So, yeah, don't worry. she's not a complete perfect angel! (But pretty close, IMO ;)

More Effective

Recap of Audrey lesson number...6? I've lost track.

It felt really hot out last night. We actually left a couple of the sprinklers running in the arena while I was warming up, which felt pretty nice! The great thing with the horses living at such a busy barn is that the things you might normally worry about them spooking at...are not much of an issue. So, Audrey calmly walk/trot/cantered through the noisy, heavy duty sprinklers that water the arena.

As a result of the heat, A felt a lot less energetic than normal. Still, she'll meet you halfway if you ask nicely (and let her express her feelings just a little :). Last night, although getting the energy level I wanted was a little more labour intensive than normal, we got there without much of a fuss and the remainder of the ride was good.

There's not much too exciting to recap as far as the nitty gritty details - we worked on walk pirouettes and did a lot of square corners in trot and canter before moving on to riding a lot of transitions within canter. The breakthrough for me was that I'm getting a lot better at collecting the canter and then opening it up again without collapsing my core too much or losing A's balance. I struggle with the really fine adjustments to my body, but things are getting better and I was able to bring the canter back and forth reliably and got a good feel for the amount of energy I need in her hind legs to get her 'bouncing on the spot'. So, that was pretty cool. Also, there was zero kicking at my outside leg in the canter, or inadvertent lead changes even as we played with changing the bend, so that's a win for me.

I'm getting fairly reliable at not pressing the passenger eject button

EC happily exclaimed "this is the most effective riding I've ever seen from you!" and my first instinct was to be a little embarrassed, because I feel really weak and ineffective still on the huge moving Ms Audrey...like if this is 'better' imagine how bad it is normally! But I'll silence that inner mean girl, take the compliment as it was intended, and look forward to getting better yet.

A, post cooling bath, enjoying some small snacks in the shade. I feel like the new title of this blog should be: "Project Gingersnap: Taking Bad Pictures of Good Horses Since 2011"

I have to say yet again what a fantastic horse Audrey is. She's got all sorts of opinions and makes me work, but when it comes down to it she's extremely generous. I'm not kidding myself that I've magically improved this much in 6 lessons and that my riding is making her go better, a lot of it is her adjusting to me and being quite forgiving with what I ask.

I love Bridget dearly, but I have to say the novelty of riding a mare that happily gets to work without multiple reminders and encouragement is pretty sweet. A also lets me know when I'm not up to her standards, but moves on and forgives me, unlike a certain little pony mare we all know and love. 

Good thing I actually find B's thought processes and her resulting actions to avoid work intriguing and funny a lot of the time. She's that total slacker we've all worked with that spends more time and energy thinking up creative shortcuts to avoid work, than the effort it would take to just do the job. In this picture, I'm 99% sure that she's wondering if there is a chance I've just tacked her up for a photo op or some hand grazing :)

Got This

I was a little nervous for this week's lesson. My coach tolerates all sorts of things from me, but I know people who don't put in the time and do the homework aren't her favorite people to teach. And, guess who didn't do any homework? Me. I failed spectacularly. Not only did I not follow up on my lesson 2 weeks ago...I hadn't even ridden since then. Such shame!

Even my cat is judging me for the amount of sleeping I'm doing.

I had "reasons" to not be in the saddle...I was away on vacation, away working, away at the horse trials. Bridget had a cough. And then I was just plain old tired.

Alternate place to sleep, free of judgmental kitties.

So, yeah. I nearly cancelled. Feeling like I hadn't ridden in forever, the first Monday back to work after a holiday, plus the early morning ferry ride and 2.5hr commute made me a little sad. Then I remembered my promise to myself to never back out of things or make excuses because I'm not ready or the timing isn't right. If the opportunity is present, I'm supposed to be grabbing it.

And, you guessed it, I had the best lesson ever. The transitions were sharp, and the energy was good. I kept myself accountable for my body, Audrey kept herself honest about hers. I didn't back off from pushing her a bit, and OMG we even got a few steps of passage (she's very much still learning it too, so it felt pretty special to me that she offered it up for me and my not so perfect asking)

I'm still woefully out of shape, so I didn't play as much as I would have liked - it's hard work riding big moving, sensitive ponies! There were lots of moments that just felt amazing in the saddle, though. Like I might be addicted to the feel of going from collected to medium gaits and back...totally understand now Robert Dover saying that you should always feel like no matter what you're doing, that you could instantly access any other thing. It made sense, obviously, in my mind, when I heard that, but the energy required for the horse to be that on the aids and reactive is a different feel than I would have imagined. Bridget and I can play with extending and collecting, but it's very much a balancing act and it evolves over a few strides while I generate the appropriate bounce/energy. Riding A, you get the energy established at the beginning of the ride, and then she's pretty honest about keeping it at the ready for you. You literally just sit up a teeny bit and keep your leg there and you're bouncing on a trampoline :) Loosen your hips a little and you're bouncing across the arena in huge leaps. SO MUCH FUN!

Fingers crossed this little cutie is half as much fun to ride as Audrey when she grows up.

Thinking on it, I believe I had a great ride because although I dropped the ball on actually riding, I've been doing yoga every morning and walking most days too. I know that's not the same as riding, but the yoga? Totally life altering for me and really helping me sort out all the tightness in my lower back. I'm making progress towards getting better mobility in my shoulders too. I'll never be a super bendy, flexible person, but I'm enjoying how each morning is a bit of a check in for where my body is at, and I'm starting to become a lot more conscious of all the little movements and changes of posture that affect me positively or negatively. So, for example, in the saddle, when EC is like "looser with your lower back", I'm better able to do that because I'm more aware, but also because the range of motion is improved. I think Audrey appreciates that.

Actual image of me doing yoga. Never said I was good at it, but I do like it :)

Apologies for my continuing bad media...I have new pictures on my tablet, but of course here I am at lunch on my work computer with no media. In the spirit of actually posting updates, I feel like I'd best just get this out there now :)