You know what I hate? Discussing personal medical stuff...I don't know why I have such an aversion to it, but it's making it hard to blog when I kind of need to mention it. The good thing about this space is that I can write directly about how it's affecting horses and riding, which I find much more comfortable than explaining to curious coworkers or acquaintances why I'm hobbling around :)
Anyway...this week's really great happenings are that I'm feeling much more myself in every way. I'm still struggling to stay where I need to be physically and not be frustrated I can't do all the things immediately, but there have been massive improvements in mobility and pain levels since my last post and I'm feeling so much better. I walk every second day and do physio exercises on the other day and each week I am able to do a bit more without regretting it later. I'm feeling super positive about being able to get back to a really good place.
You've never met someone who enjoys every moment of every day until you've met Sophie |
I sat on a horse (Bridget) for the first time in 6 weeks and went for a little walk around (OK, my husband led me while I wore every safety item I own because I'm not physically quite there yet...but also, mental health needs consideration too). Using stirrups and navigating mounting with a saddle would be a challenge still, but toodling around in a bareback pad was perfectly comfortable and something I think I could be doing solo soon. I was joking that this is B's penance...99% sure a very impolite post jump pony maneuver and my resulting tumble a couple of years ago is where I got hurt. If not that, probably one of our other misadventures through the years, so she can do some time as pony rehab :)
Part time physio consultant in addition to her full time job as Sophie discipliner |
I think I might be at a place in life where any of a long list of setbacks might make me take a second look at my life choices, but this has certainly made me reevaluate what I'm doing. I am currently feeling like I'm pretty lucky (fingers crossed for further smooth sailing) . A mix between 'time is short and anything can happen, live the life you want now!' and also 'my body needs to last so I need to be more responsible about looking after it'
Sophie again demonstrating YOLO, is less concerned with looking after her body since annoying B too much never ends well for her |
With the chat last month about riding as a whole, or at least some riding activities possibly being off the table, I realized very quickly I had a whole giant bucket list I hadn't accomplished (and not even like I tried and didn't do it, more I just felt like I had all the time in the world to get to it...some day). This experience has done wonders for clarifying exactly what I want and need to prioritize doing.
S would always like to be invited along for any adventure. |
It's too soon for some decisions, others have been no brainers. I'm not sending B for breeding, because I think my need for a Bridget 2.0 will be more immediate than the 5 or so years out I'd need to wait for a foal to grow to a rideable pony that can do much. Also, I think I'm going to be feeling less flexible about what I want and need, so at the very minimum I need to be looking at youngsters already on the ground and doing some things.
B has been very snuggly lately - very unlike her! |
Anyway, we move on and I'll check in when I have good updates to share.
That's so awesome your recovery is going well and that you are getting stronger and more mobile!
ReplyDeleteI feel very grateful!
DeleteSo inspired by your outlook through all this <3
ReplyDeleteI post on the good days :) There have been plenty of tears, but generally I'm pretty practical and goal oriented so it's more just been a matter of reframing what I want and how I'm going to get there
DeleteNothing like certain events to clarify things. I’m glad that you’re feeling better.
ReplyDeleteI hope Quaid is doing well today!
DeleteSounds like things are heading in a positive direction for you as you continue to recover. I have some chronic pain issues and so identify with your comment " A mix between 'time is short and anything can happen, live the life you want now!' and also 'my body needs to last so I need to be more responsible about looking after it' ." It seems to be a constant point of negotiation. Glad you got to swing back on Bridget, too. It's amazing how even a short, quiet ride can lift our spirits when we've been out of the saddle for awhile.
ReplyDeleteEven a tiny step towards a goal feels better than none! Re: the daily negotiation - exactly the perfect way to describe it! I'm sorry you're there too. There have been plenty of reality checks lately but I feel like I'm slowly getting to a place where at least I have a vague idea of what the negotiations might be, rather than just feeling lost :)
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